Now sorry to disappoint all the lovely gentleman who clicked on here with the expectation this was going to be a little saucy….It’s not! This one is for the girls…
Someone at my office had an interview recently and the board reviewing her were 3 women. Now she thought more about what she wore and how she looked for this interview more so than if she went on a date, simply because it was an all female line up! She was concerned about looking “too nice” or “too done up” because “we know what women are like”. She was right and this struck accord with me. Are we that bitter and jealous as women that we would not give a job to another woman based on what she looked like or how she carried herself?
As women we judge, we bitch and amongst other things we don’t appreciate the effort, the heartache and the struggle that another woman has gone through despite most of us being able to relate. I myself can judge and being the loud one I am, will often be the first to comment on another woman to put her down all to make myself feel better because I am jealous. Hard to admit but it is true and I challenge anyone to say they haven’t done the same! I look at those skinny girls in the gym and want to fly kick them into a KFC and force feed them hot wings, but why? Because if they look worse it will make ME feel better about me rather than ME making myself feel better about me on my own!
I have had the conversation with many friends and most of us do the same, you look at a girl and you think “my man would like her” or “he would prefer her over me” or “I hope he doesn’t even notice her” LOL…We go out of our way to put ourselves in competition with each other and for what reason? We create, judge, compete and decide in a competition all created in our minds!
The workplace, The shopping centre, The bar and most especially the nightclub toilets are all places where we as women judge the most, because obviously taking the time out to just “be nice” too each other is simply too much effort. We have all looked at another girls outfit and said “she should never of worn that” and I can never understand how her friends are her true friends if they let her wear it! However we compete with even our own friends! Her friends probably let her wear the dress that’s too tight and not so flattering around her legs, boobs, or bum simply because it makes her one less person to compete with!
I recently went to an comedy event and was met by hostility, dirty looks and was even shoved on purpose by another female. I asked a male friend why this occurs to which he replied “They are intimidated by you” I am a chunky 5ft 2 umpa lumpa, A smurf is more intimidating than me! But it occurred to me then that this is what we do. I don’t think those girls realised the effect they had on me and how uncomfortable and awkward I felt throughout the evening.
Spice girls preached GIRL POWER, Destiny’s child told all the ladies to put their hands up, Beyonce told us we run the world and Aretha Franklin asked for a little Respect but have we taken note?
Before you judge the woman next to wonder if she is doing and feeling the same as you! When you go to give the pretty girl a dirty look take a second to wonder if she knows how pretty she is. We are all insecure and unsure but why do we continue to pass these feelings on to the next woman?
Encourage your friends, empower each other and lets group together. We are the only ones who will truly understand each other, we are mothers, daughters, sisters, grandmothers, aunts, cousins and friends. A compliment from another woman can sometimes feel more genuine and mean more than if it came from a man! If you see a woman with amazing shoes, tell her! I challenge us all to compliment another woman, lift her up, boost her confidence. Let us not judge each other and bring each other down, we have enough drama with the men in our lives we don’t need to create any more!
There is no competition between us, lets stop comparing ourselves to each other and start encouraging each other to do better! We all have something to offer, something different, unique and special. We are all human and have feelings, we all hurt, we all cry but we all love. Sometimes just not enough!
I love you ladies! And I publicly apologise to any woman I have hurt, upset or made feel less about herself!
So here is to us! To boobs! To Bikini Waxes, To child birth, To Periods! haha! We are hard core ladies and we just need to tell each other that a little more often.
Thanks for stopping by
P.S. We all have a feminist inside us somewhere.